Convocated!

I hate goodbyes. In my ideal world, people would meet with a hoop and a hurrah but when it comes to farewells, they would just mumble it, or better, just nod! “I grunt my farewell” is my motto. But if there is a meeting there has to be a departure (duality you see) and my reaction to this necessary evil is to put on a blasé expression and spout pithy words like “Life is too short for goodbyes” or a re-assuring “It is a small world...” or a Mafiosi-like “We will meet again”. But the truth is I hate goodbyes. The reason is mostly selfish. “Goodbyes” indicate a transition, moving to new environs, change and most worryingly, new people. What if you never really meet people whose wavelength doesn’t match with yours?

And so, I reasoned, why dwell on things that remind you of the change? Therefore, once my viva got over I hurriedly packed my luggage and headed home. (Okay, I admit, I stayed for one more day after the viva. May I rot in CCW hell!)

When I saw the mail asking us to confirm our participation in the convocation, I was torn. My fear of goodbyes still persisted but then again, it is a Convocation! As a wag once remarked, “Sometimes marriages may occur twice, but a Convocation occurs only once!” Suitably convinced by such bad logic, I booked a ticket on the Airavatha service of KSRTC and waited in anticipation for the day.

Like all best laid plans, this one had its potential of going gang-aft agley. You see I was doing the first term of my post graduation and like most first terms there was quite some work to be done and the Damocles sword of “surprise quizzes” hanging over my head. An obscure psychological study once found that a statistically significant proportion of those who hated surprises generally had once been subjected to surprises quizzes. There is of course the case of the lady-from-a-reputed- business- school who broke off her engagement and ran to the library when her fiancé shouted “surprise” on Valentine’s Day!

Anyway, the plunge was taken with a brave heart and it was sure worth it! The convocation is a ceremony basically, but like all ceremonies the rituals and the solemnity of the occasion ordain a certain halo to it. I eagerly went to collect my gown and I was a tad bit disappointed to discover that undergraduates do not get tassels.

The Convocation started off with the dignitaries walking in to the tune of what was called a Police Band. As the Chief Guest Dr.R. Chidamabaram, the Director, Deans and HoDs walked on to the stage, in their wizard like flowing gowns, for a brief moment, one got a sense of history and the import of the ceremony itself.

A digression now. It is very interesting to speculate on the evolution of the University system since many of the rituals (if you can call it that) in the Convocation do not fit into an Indian context at all. The use of Latin, the robes themselves and the whole atmosphere all seem to be vestiges of practises dating to perhaps, the Renaissance.
And therein lays an interesting paradox. Modern thought and education often portray religious education and scientific education as opposites. The argument is often reduced to one of Rational Vs. Irrational. But during the Renaissance, some of the biggest advances in intellectual thought were made by monks. Gregor Mendel of the Theory of Heredity is perhaps the most famous monk-scientist. Another one I recently came across was a Francisan Friar named Luca Pacioli, referred to as the Father of Accounting, for inventing the double entry book keeping system. Bayes’ Theorem is named after a Reverend Thomas Bayes.

I remember reading numerous other names which keep cropping up, especially in achievements related to mathematics. A possible reason could be that before the invention of printing, it was the job of monasteries to make copies of the ancient tomes of Egypt, Greece and Rome. Therefore, monks had an almost exclusive access to these works of great intellectual achievement. Therefore, monasteries may have played more important roles as centres of education.

Then why this divorce between Science and Religion and when did it occur? One can speculate that the separation of Science from Religion had to do something with the notion of separating Church from State which in turn traces its origins to the French Revolution. An interesting question arises: Were the persecution stories of Galileo and Copernicus played up by ideological forces interested in the separation of state and church?

Aah... history is never simple. I think we are too conditioned by the concept of a mathematical proof and therefore, when we look for “proof” in other subjects we tend to define it in mathematical terms. However, such a proof requires an absolute, independent framework to start with. With history, we just do not have that! Biases are built into the very structure of historical study. As a consequence, a logically rigorous approach to history, while intellectually stimulating, is prone to be futile!

Anyway, as I was saying before, any sense of history was only momentary. In the bare and functional architecture of SAC, it is really difficult to feel anything more than the urge to play badminton! The function began and most of us were reeling from the heat and suffocation and looking frequently at the program to see when we could get our degrees, the coveted IIT chaapa!

One of the expected highlights from a Convocation is the speech from the Chief Guest and I felt that as speeches go, the one by Dr.R.Chidamabaram was a tad bit disappointing. Please do not get me wrong. I am in no way competent to comment nonchalantly of a person with quite an impressive list of achievements and that too, a physicist. (I have always held the view that Physics is the only subject worth studying at school level) But I have always felt that once these big scientists reach a certain level, the intellectual sharpness and ruthlessness seem to reduce and is replaced by an ambiguity in approach that would give a complex to MBAs! But then again my dissatisfaction with the speech could be a reflection of my own biases.

I think there are three formulaic approaches which would definitely work for Convocation Speeches. One approach is to convey a gung-ho “Go get ‘em tiger, but watch out for a couple of things” kind of speech. I am reminded of one by Azim Premji at a Convocation at IIMA. The other one is take a reflective, nostalgia tinged approach. A good example would be Steve Jobs’ “Connecting the Dots” speech. Baz Luhrman’s “Everybody is free to wear sunscreen” is the absolute gem in this department and few can better this! The approach I prefer is to be provocative. Raise an issue, ruffle a couple of feathers, never hurts as long as you are perfectly rational in the process. There was an internet hoax which alleged that Larry Ellison of Oracle got on to podium at Harvard and said that the top 10 richest people in the Forbes’ list were dropouts! While the speech was definitely not true and I am not too sure about the factoid, just imagine the effect it would have had!

Finally, after the Madam Registrar proposed that “...One Thousand three hundred and ten degrees be given out in person or in absentia”, the Director started awarding the degrees. The IITM degree certificate is extremely well done and one spends the initial moment literally basking in the reflected glory. After marvelling at one’s photo, a curious feeling of having “done something” sets in. I say curious because one hasn’t really done anything solid, if you think about it. This is just the first step to making things or doing things or blazing trails. But a sweet, pleasant feeling permeates the body and a genuine feeling of triumph is felt.

However, I must admit one thing now. I felt pangs of jealousy during the part where they gave out the medals for various achievements. While I have the highest regards for all the winners and as usual the awards reflected the best of the student community, the negative feelings were a reminder of how screwed up my priorities had been. So why don’t we do things in reverse and make the incoming batch sit for the convocation? This way they can get a feel of what they are going to get at the end of the process! But jokes apart, the convocation was an awesome experience and it was really satisfying just being there.

The Extra-Curricular Scene - Need for Introspection

(This is a very IITM specific post. Please do not attempt to draw any conclusions unless you are realy well versed with the scene.)

When I heard that one of the Hostel Nites was scheduled for April 18th, I let out a whistle. I just couldn't believe it! The guys involved with organizing that Hostel Nite will have less than a week to go for the end semester examination. This is cutting it too fine!

But you could hardly blame them. They were waiting for the Lit. Soc. and Schroeter events to get over. You can't blame the Lit. Soc. Events Cores because they had to set dates which didn't clash with Schroeter or Tech. Soc. or one of the innumerable festivals. Surely, you can't blame Schroeter! That is the mother of all extra-curriculars at IITM. That is the definition of Hostel Spirit. Then why did Schroeter stretch? Well, even the mighty Schroeter needs to look at Lit. Soc., Saarang, Shaastra, Mechanica, Wavez, Amalgam etc etc. Why blame Mechanica, Amalgam et al? After all, aren't they small fests, mere two to three day affairs, nothing when compared to the bigger distractions of Institute and Hostel elections. And in all this mess, we have the coordinator selections as well! But one mustn't crib for that because the wheels of Shaastra and Saarang are too mighty and have to begin rolling in May or June!

You may counter that you are exclusively a Schroeter or a Lit. Soc. guy and therefore, this argument does not apply to you. Think again! Due to the plethora of events, schedules keep getting pushed. Therefore, you may find your event happening a couple of weeks before the exams even though you may want more time. That is why one has a Hostel Nite occurring this late!

There is a more subtle problem. In recent years, I have noticed that for a team assignment at least one more person is missing due to one of the above reasons. Worse, he/she may come late. That screws up the schedule even more and what is a one hour discussion becomes a two-three hour drag. So it becomes a ripple effect and in this madness some other nicer things are lost like the opportunity to attend the rare Extra-Mural Lectures that IITM organizes.

Ideally it would be nice if say Schroeter gets over by the last week of March. Then the Hostel Nites and then a clean two weeks for the end sems. I am assuming Lit. Soc. would have gotten over by February. Saarang, Schroeter, Lit. Soc. make for a packed calendar. Shaastra was pushing the limit but it is needed. But in our case things keep happening on and on.

Let me tell you one more thing that people never admit to but it happens nevertheless. After a good sleep you get up, all ready to attack the books, then something else springs up and that is very irritating and affects the momentum. Worse still people resort to night-outs. I hate night outs! I strongly believe it affects one's health. A night-out once in a while chatting or drinking with friends is not a problem at all. In fact, it is absolutely essential. But people actually put night-outs for exams, pass muster and feel happy about it!

When confronted with this people go into denial. I don't know what people think. The prevailing thought seems to be this: 'A few "studs" (A term which I now think is extremely misleading) can manage. Therefore, I must try to do so too'. Or 'Only if I have all this can I aspire for institute elections'. God knows what people think!

Often a crib is heard that students are not working hard enough. Bunkum! My crib is that students today are working too hard. There is a tendency in IITM to take our extra-curriculars too seriously. We push the limit and kickass. No two doubts! But my question is, is it necessary?
I wish people took more time off, just farting with friends trying to analyze and understand things. Do keep a lot of time to waste in addition to sleep time and academics time.

Do these credentials help? Yes and no. Yes because working for these events / competing for the hostel and winning gives enormous confidence, not to mention lots of Kodak moments. However, a lot of plans that are made require extreme professionalism. Other than for sports practise, no one here turns up on time for anything. If you can't assure me that basic discipline, then we can't go for grandiose plans.

Also, all these core groups are evolving into bureaucracies in themselves. You have one group to do the job and you have another group to monitor them! Interviews are held late at night for posts of coordinators. Recently, there has been discussion on increasing the minimum attendance requirement. Expectedly, this met with a lot of opposition from the student body. There the convenient villain was the Dean. However, no one seems to be reprimanding these cores for keeping interviews so late. Are we to believe that this practice has nothing to do with the bad attendance? But you mustnt blame the cores. They are stretched themselves.

This leaves the individual. The blame then is on the individual. Yes. It is tough for anyone to kill something. Cores will make grander and grander plans.(I hear the craze now is to do a MIT. Well, most of the pseud things in MIT are done by grads. Whoever has heard about MIT undergrads? My my, there must be a reason, mustn't there? And just because of the Narayanamurthy comment on 60 Minutes, when a guy passes the JEE he suddenly feels obliged to take inspiration from MIT. Well, Einsteins, we must realize the JEE of these days is nowhere near the class of the older JEEs. So stop comparing, cock up and just do whatever gives you intellectual fulfillment. That is why you are here for.)

In this kind of a scenario, the individual has to make up his/her mind. The implicit promise/expectation when you leave IIT is that you are academically competent. You could have a low CGPA and still be very good. Lots of people are uncomfortable with the quiz system, but it is still a good system. And IIT has to grade students in some way. So if you have a problem with that, live with it, but there is a lot of other things one can do. The excuse is not to put off doing any sort of intellectual activity to the night before the exams.

The biggest casualty of the one-night mug concept is the art of figuring things out for yourself. Sure, when people work for these fests they do figure out a lot of things for themselves. Agreed! But after a point the learning is incremental. That is why 2 coordships = 4 coordships = 6 coorships = Core = Insti. Sec. in this respect. Anyway, coming back to the initial issue of one-night mug: since only one day is left, people get fundaes from a group, use older question papers and pass muster. But then you lose out on studying from text books. To give an example, however good one may be in say, chemical engineering thermodynamics, if you have not read Lewis and Randall, you have definitely lost something in terms of intellectual experience.

Therefore, you define your involvement. Extra-curriculars help for bullet points but not at the cost of academic and intellectual competence. You decide the trade-offs. if you think you can't meet expectations or the expectations are stupid, don't apply, don't participate, walk out. We may love our friends and seniors but a line has to be drawn. I think the tipping point has been reached. My God, April 18th it seems... and Saarang interviews are not even over! What the fuck!

"BTPology"

(Apparent Work = Energy spent on coffee trips to G'nath/Tifany's + Energy blogging + Energy IMing+....+ Real Work)

A Picture speaks a thousand words... So true! :)

Misplaced Idealism

As much as I would love to keep IITiana out of this blog there is one argument I must analyze.

Before I get into my main argument, I shall digress to talk about a phenomenon I call IITiana and frankly it irritates me quite a bit. It refers to the excessive glorification/criticism of IITs that has entered the mainstream media today. This exists in the form of badly written book(s), movies, newspaper reports about cultural festivals and sometimes plays. The problem is not the media hype. Indian media today is an arse and we have to live with that. But the fact of the matter is that understatement is the hallmark of class. When dealing with the media it is very important to know what has to be left unsaid and it is THIS which is the indicator of pedigree. Sadly, people from both inside and outside the IIT system don't seem to be exercising this. In the long run this may result in a "Familiarity breeds contempt" problem.

The other aspect of IITiana is the arbitrary criticism. Someone somewhere designs something which is significant, the attendant question is "Why hasn't IIT done this?" There are a lot of non-tech jobs which pay well, immediately the cry goes, "IITians are not doing the job they were set up for". Another plaint is "You people are gifted, you must stay in India and change the world" (The implicit admission being I am a weeny and I will not do anything, but blame the system for everything)

"Changing the World" has cousins like "Let us make a difference" or "Giving back to Society" or even "Wanting to do something meaningful". Old people have been saying this and there is absolutely no problem as long as you know you have to ignore it and move on. But the problem comes when young, wet-in-the-ear virgins talk about all this. My message to all those 20s odd wannabes who worry too much about whether they are giving back to society, my answer is take all those feelings, put it in a bottle and shove it up your arse.

Here's why. There is a fundamental asymmetry in the power distribution. The old hold the power but the young have to go magically save the world. Politics is/must be a pursuit of the 35-70. (Actually it should be 35-50 but our country has such a fucked up understanding of respect to elders) "Then what do I do until then?", you may ask. Good question. Well, study hard for one. Take up some activity and prove yourself in that. Just don't squander the prime of your youth in "Making a difference". Why again? The fact of the matter is no one is going to take your political views too seriously when you are young. Therefore, there is a higher chance you get used for someone else's ham-headed actions than for your own good. If you don't know what I mean ask all those who campaigned for Lok Paritran how they feel.

Whereas, if you DO prove yourself in some activity then people will/have to/want to take you seriously. How much ever I may feel Arundhati Roy's views are incomplete and sometimes idiotic, she has earned that space by winning an International Prize. I haven't. Therefore, any day she has more credibility than I do. Period. Only if you achieve, must you deserve and only then can you desire.

See, if anyone asked me a thumb rule, I would say as a young man setting out on a career one's motivation must be to get either power, money, fame or a combination of these things. That way atleast you have had a good time and if you are really good you will get there anyway. To give a crude analogy, often in life it is tough to even know what is the global optimum. But we do have a pretty good idea of the local optimum. So your aim must be to secure the local optimum as anyway reaching the global optimum is a matter of great uncertainty. Then the following argument arises:

Then didn't Mother Teresa make a difference?
Yes, she did. She lived a wonderful life of sacrifice. No questions about that.

Isn't her life of sacrifice holier than mine?
No, you fucking moron, THAT's the point. When starting off the aim must be to secure one's future. That is your duty. By some turn of circumstance she was already a nun. You have been trained as a professional.

How do you do your duties?
For most part,if you achieve money/power/fame, you and your family will be extremely happy. Do that first.

Then wouldn't the world descend into chaos?
No. This is the result of too much self-righteousness. The world has gone on and it will. Someone will rise to the occasion.

Doesn't the onus fall on me?
No. If you happen to be at the right place at the right time and it clicks, great. if it doesn't you are not in any way worse off, or more responsible.

Does that mean that one has to be uni-dimensional?
Not at all. I strongly believe that there will be a huge resurgence of generalists and polymaths as a reaction to the era of specialization we live in. It is just that do whatever you like and do it well. That's enough.

See, one realizes that idealism is for the old, contrary to popular "wisdom".

To conclude, I would like to quote Gordon Gecko in the movie Wall Street:

The point is, ladies and gentleman, that greed -- for lack of a better word -- is good.
Greed is right.
Greed works.
Greed clarifies, cuts through, and captures the essence of the evolutionary spirit.
Greed, in all of its forms -- greed for life, for money, for love, knowledge -- has marked the upward surge of mankind.